Thursday, September 23, 2010

Burnt Threat

Dear John Doe,

First of all I have to say, I am SO glad not to be in the presence of your typical black faggot ass anymore! I knew, I just KNEW when I first corresponded with you via telephone that I was not going to like you. If you want to even go deeper, I hit the nail on the head when I judged you simply by your name and tone over the phone. You are the most self-centered queen I've ever had to associate with. Before you even knew who I really was, you were so kind towards me. It was when you got a good gander and who I am that you figured you would put me through the ringer and try to impede my progress.

Honey, I'm not coming for you. I'm no threat to you. I don't think I'm the baddest, the cutest, the "token" nor do I don't want your job. So pump your brakes and slow the fuck down please. I'm not trying to out-dress you, I'm not trying to haggle up all the females and I'm not threatened by you. If you really want to get down to it, your taste in fashion is despicable. You're not a fucking model so get your pictures off of "ModelMayheim.com" and stop clacking around in those cheap ass shoes. You want to represent? Then why don't you just be real, unless you actually are then my bad. But if that happens to be the case then go to hell and burn the way you are.

I really wish I had the energy to waste on checking you in person but honey at this point and after breaking you down and basically invalidating you, you aren't even worth a side-eyed glance and a nasty thought. Die queen...

-A lesson that has come with great consequence, and NOW I will be more judgmental.

Signed,

Harvey Champagne.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Dummy Bitch

Dear Jane Doe,

You're the dumbest bitch I know at the moment. It's one thing to be ignorant to your demise, but to know and still run around like a foolish hoe is just beyond me. How can you live like that? Is it really possible to have fun and live it up with such thoughts in mind? Or do you even have thoughts of your inevitable demise in mind? I hope to God that the last answer isn't "No" because that would just make you an even worse human being than I already think you are in my confusion. Don't fuck it up please...I would rather not run out of words.

If you became anymore fucking silly and disgusting than you already are I would just have to kill myself to save myself the acknowledgement that there really is someone like you that exists in this world. Do me a favor though and don't call me asking me dumb shit that you already know and make me look like a fucking ass when I realize that everything I said was in vain. Do me an even bigger favor and just disappear. Well...you might not have to execute that one for me. Ha ha ha!...

I don't know how I get so caught up wasting my time with hopeless hookers like you, and shame on me for fooling me twice because this is my SECOND time going through this bullshit and drama with you. In fact, you turn me off completely from wanted to even accept or be friends with females at all. You're doing an injustice to your own gender you fucking bitch. I think you forget that I'm not impressed by your cunt so I don't fall for that estrogen spell like the fucking idiots you already got pounding you out and/or the ones you have planned to. Nasty bitch...

-A lesson that has come with GREAT consequence, and now I will be more judgmental.

Signed,

Harvey Champagne.